Friends, it’s official: we’re broke. We spent about three too many days on vacation pretending to be in a different income bracket. In order to avoid panic, I’m making a list of things that are free. Please feel free to add your own in the comments. Lord knows I’m going to need them.

1. YouTube videos of yoga classes are free.

2. Hanging out with a friend at home is free.

3. Jamming and songwriting are free.

4. Writing a letter to a friend is free.

5. Calling your grandmother is free.

6. Going for a run on the lakeshore is free.

7. Swimming in the lake is free!

8. Rearranging your furniture is free.

9. Cleaning out your filing cabinet is free. (Okay, am I the only person who gets serious joy out of doing this?)

10. Cuddling, hugging, kissing, and … everything else in this category is free.

11. Dog-watching at the park is free.

12. On certain days, going to certain museums is free. (Note to self: find out where and when this is happening.)

13. Excellent books from the library are free.

14. Having a private dance party in your living room is free.

15. Mad Men marathons on Netflix are free. (Okay, okay, $8 a month.)

16. BONUS: praying for surprise gigs is free.